Precursor to that divorce….

Marriage is a Sacrifice; a Relationship between two Forgivers. That is to say that the adage, “Error is to human’, is applicable to singles as much as it is for marrieds. Error happens more in marriage because you are two strangers making a bed together.

That said, NO Marriage breaks overnight. The break goes through several stages…

***Honeymoon stage...

This is a wondrous time with love very tangible in the air. It is impossible to imagine that a wedge can come between them. It is a beautiful time indeed.

***Normal life stage.

___When reality begins to check in.

___What you see when there’s no wig or make up on the face.

___This is when you know a friend in your partner.

___This when the pepper someone has been eating for years is finding its way out.

___Here your patience, endurance, Love is put to work; someone knows where and how you can stink and still enjoy the blessing of God that addeth no sorrow.

1 Peter 4:8 NKJV And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.”

1 Peter 4:8 NLT Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.

***Criticism Stage…

Handling weaknesses is still plausible, always making room for one another.

***Warfare stage…

You always do research on what next to use to better your partner, always making sure they are on top of their game. Oh yes, the zeal still burns for you to pray for them..

***Avoidance stage…

This is the day you lose what attracted you to one another, and you begin to kill your marriage.

This leads to emotional separation. No more connection

It once happened with another couple who quarrelled over salt in the food and ended up not talking to one another for two good months. Within these months, this man applied for a job and the day of interview was nigh. The man slept a little late preparing for the interview and wrote a letter to his wife saying, “Please wake me up at 5:30am so that I am not late for the interview”, then laid it next to her bedside. The woman saw it, read and replied at 5:30am saying, “It’s time to wake up, please don’t be late to go for the interview, Wake up!” She then carefully placed it at his bedside. The devil is a liar, the man enjoyed deep dream enclave only to wake up at 8:40am and the interview was at 7am. This is the day ‘intervention’ happened and they began talking again. “I told you to wake me up”, he blurted angrily. Then the wife retorted, “I woke you up by writing it in capital letters.” They ended up reconciling understanding that if they were in oneness, this opportunity would not have bypassed.

Therefore, always strive to make peace with all men.

God dwells where there is unity, joy and Praise.

True love drives away fear, shame and inferiority/superiority complex.

1 John 4:18 KJV There is no fear in Love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.

***Separation stage…

When all manner of intervention fails, some couples move into separate bedrooms. Remember that does not happen in a blink of an eye but a gradual process whose roots must be addressed because the clock is ticking.


It finally strikes midnight and many disastrous decisions are reached.

Will we turn the clock back, I am not so sure?

How about we work to stay in the normal stage?